by Greta Wolfsberger
Chivalry, originally a code of conduct created to keep knights from becoming thugs, has today become a way to show respect for others.
Fathers, grandfathers, and uncles have taught their younger charges right from wrong for centuries. They also taught the meaning of respect and some basic behaviors their young male charges should follow. Here are a few.
Listen, do not interrupt. Say please and thank you at every possible occasion. Give up your seat to a woman or an elderly person. Show gratitude to those who serve us, from waitpersons to military veterans.
Whether it is a building door or a car door, a man should open and hold doors for women and others as a courtesy.
Pull out and hold chairs for the safety and convenience of your companion.
A man should walk on the streetside of the sidewalk for safety reasons.
Always walk a lady all the way to her door to ensure she is safe.
Offer your coat if the lady is cold, or if she is carrying items, help her put it on.
No, chivalry is not dead in Gen Z and Gen Alpha. But it’s going away.
Chivalry is still important. The values and purpose behind it, such as being aware and caring for others, haven’t changed. Many people in Gen Z and Gen Alpha learned these lessons as kids. The problem isn’t that people don’t understand; it’s that they don’t practice chivalry anymore. Manners slowly start to go away when they aren’t modeled or reinforced as often.
It can be awkward to pull out a chair or offer someone a seat when they come to the table because it’s not something that happens very often anymore. Even well-meaning gestures can make you feel uncomfortable when no one else is doing them. People stop doing things that make them feel uncomfortable over time, even if they know they are right.
People don’t shake hands as firmly and often avoid eye contact. These used to be automatic signs of respect and confidence, but they have become strange when you don’t use them often.
Holding doors open, being aware of others when you walk, and letting others go first are still good things to do, but they don’t happen as often. It’s easier to forget about manners when they aren’t always expected.
Chivalry isn’t about following traditions just because they are traditions. It’s about respect for the people around you. When these little things stop happening, so does a sense of appreciation that everyone has in everyday situations.
Chivalry is not out of date. It just needs to be practiced to stay alive. When respect is restored, manners return.
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